Funny Get Well Quotes

Funny get well soon quotes that you can use to send to friends or family to wish them a speedy recovery.
    Get well cards have become so humorous that if you don't get sick you're missing half the fun.
    - Flip Wilson
    I learned a long time ago that minor surgery is when they do the operation on someone else, not you.
    - Bill Walton
    I reckon being ill as one of the great pleasures of life, provided one is not too ill and is not obliged to work till one is better.
    - Samuel Butler
    I wonder why you can always read a doctor's bill and you can never read his prescription.
    - Finley Peter Dunne
    You have a cough? Go home tonight, eat a whole box of Ex-Lax - tomorrow you'll be afraid to cough.
    - Pearl Williams
    After two days in the hospital, I took a turn for the nurse.
    - W.C. Fields
    Be careful when reading health books; you may die of a misprint.
    - Mark Twain
    Doctors are always working to preserve our health and cooks to destroy it, but the latter are the more often successful.
    - Denis Diderot
    Sometimes I get the feeling the aspirin companies are sponsoring my headaches.
    - Terri Guillemets
    It's no longer a question of staying healthy. It's a question of finding a sickness you like.
    - Jackie Mason
    If I had my way I'd make health catching instead of disease.
    - Robert Ingersoll

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